Hello All!
I have been lurking here for a couple of years now, and thought it was time to share my story. It has a happy ending--
A couple of years ago I had reached the conclusion that at the age of 38, I was not as sharp as I used to be, not as motivated, not excited about my work, and passionless in my marriage. Yes, classic symptoms of depression, though I could not see it at the time. Most important was not realizing this, but my decision to do something about it. And a trip to the shrink was not on my list because of prior failed results with SSRIs. Plus, my Mom's a shrink, so it gets complicated... (I promise that's the last you'll hear about that!)
Life changing moment #1: I discovered Piracetam! Though I no longer take it, at the time it was proof that there were answers out there that no one told me about. Piracetam gave me back some of my lost mental focus and mental stamina. I was riding pretty high for over a year on it, but gradually the effects did not seem as pronounced, or maybe I just became accustomed to it. It was better than nothing, but I began to think, there must be something else out there that might even be better.
Life changing moment #2: I discovered Modafinil! With Modafinil I had outstanding focus and stamina, and only needed about 20mg a day (more if I was to work late). Modafinil made Piracetam look like a placebo to me. I continued with low doses for nearly a year. but the troubling symptoms of depression lingered, and I began to develop anxiety problems, which I never had before. (To be sure, the fact that I am starting a new business as my two other businesses were faltering contributed a lot to that...) My blood pressure began to creep into the "we gotta do something about this" territory.
Not exactly life-changing, but Catapres (Clonidine) presented itself as a good method of both handling my anxiety and also lowering the blood pressure. A great side effect is that I began to get some restful sleep. I had no idea how much I had been missing that!
A dear friend of mine made me promise to give the anti-depressants a try again. I had some limited success with Wellbutrin a few years ago, so I got ahold of more and began a regimen. Reading up to refresh my memory on what is available and what might be new and en vogue since my last bout with Lexapro, I came across Stablon (Tianeptine). and interesting stufff about Stablon-Wellbutrin combinations. so, learning that Stablon is not available in the US, went to an online store and bought a bunch for about $.70 a pill.
Stablon is life-changing moment #3. I had been on the Wellbutrin for about 3 weeks before the Stablon arrived. Honestly i did not 'feel' much difference with the Wellbutrin by itself, but from the VERY FIRST DAY Stablon shook me right out of my blues. It does everything for me that the Piracetam did in terms of focus, and what the Modafinil low-dose was doing for my stamina. I have read a lot about stablon on imminst and was guarded as to what to expect, but it's everything I could have hoped for.
Got my drive back with work, no longer wake up feeling overwhelmed, failures and bad days just roll off me now, I drink less because I just do not crave it . The times I did decide to throw a few beers back, I found myself stopping much earlier than I otherwise would have. I used to crave cigarettes and now not at all. They were kind of a crutch when the stress hit.
My challenge now is to figure out if the Wellbutrin is truly contributing and synergistic, or if I can cut it out. I suppose that will be pretty easy to do, but right now I do not want to upset the applecart.
I also know that these drugs don't always last, that the efficacy sometimes fades and a new regimen is called for. But I hope to God that does not happen!
The purpose of this was not to bore anyone to death, or brag about how I found this solution all by my little self. I just wanted to point Stablon out to those who are having trouble like I was, and to give others on the search hope that there is an answer out there! Keep looking...
RDanneskjold
